Parenting About Labels!

What an amazing week! Barbara Probst was a guest on my Just Parenting About radio show. In her book "When the Labels Don't Fit", Probst explores how many children do things that seem odd, troubling, or excessive at some point in the development, and our culture is quick to attach a label to every child who's "outside the box" or hard to raise.

Then last night, my good friend, Rain Fordyce called to discuss a series of events that made her look at a label she was using- Unschooler. We had a long talk about how labels sometimes are useful. She was able to connect with some wonderful, empowered parents who validated what her family's intention was in expoloring the world of homeschooling, in particular, unschooling. Her children received validation and made great friends with like-minded children. Many deep, philosophical discussions followed which were inspiring and educational.

THEN, the downside of labels happened! Someone makes the guidelines, the rules so to speak. The must do's and must have's.... all pretty funny when you think that radical unschooler's pride themselves on not having rules.... SO, the rule is- not to have rules... but that is the problem! That is a rule! OK, let me give you an example if you are wondering what the heck I am talking about.

Rain's family has a few non-negotiables they have agreed to. OK, are you ready?

1. Do your chart in the morning by 11am (this is brush hair, brush teeth, get dressed and make bed. The only non-negotiable is brush teeth however... the other issues are really their choice unless they want to play with their friends... well most days...) 2. Eat most of your dinner (not all) if you want dessert. (since we had cake for breakfast yesterday, I am thinking this isn't a true non-negotiable all day, but I guess for dinner it is mostly true.) 3. Get off of the computer when we ask. (well... again... most days and when they finish their game or whatever else they might be up to...)

Her unschooling friend lovingly let her know that these rules make her ineligable to be an unschooler.... Read Rain's account of what happened (it is worth the read, even if you are not a homeschooler or an unschooler.) Just like the interview with Barbara Probst was so much more than just the labels like ADD, ADHD, Autism.. the labels we give ourselves and the people around us can really place us into boxes we do not even realize we are in! Bust out... think about the labels you are using for you and your family!!!

If you are a homeschooler or an unschooler that has been wondering what was not feeling right about the "SYSTEM". Let me know, we are breaking out of the labels and ALLOWING ourselves to live as Authentic Families! Love to share the journey with you!!!!

Here's to being a Passion Parent!

Christine Hiebel

Just Parenting About!