Effective communication between you and the one you are caring for is a
very important step in establishing a strong bond. Both you and the
one you are caring for need to voice your opinions so that there are
no hidden agendas or untold feelings between the two of you.
I remember how important it was in allowing my cerebral palsy daughter
a voice in setting her own goals. For many years, we held planning
meetings without including her in the discussions. We set the goals
that we felt we should be able to achieve with her over the upcoming year.
After she graduated from high school, we decided to place her into a group
home. This worked for a while and then she became very bossy and
uncooperative in the home. We then decided to try to let her share an
apartment with a mentally challenged individual that she had become
friends with. This did not work for very long and we were back at the
planning table.
We then decided to place a paid caregiver with her in the apartment.
My daughter rebelled and would not clean, cook, or talk to the person
living with her. We then asked her what she wanted and she told us that
she wanted to get her own apartment, manage her own bank account, and
do all her own shopping and cleaning. We decided to listen and we found
her a one bedroom apartment, set her up with a bank account that she managed,
and allowed her to do her own shopping and cleaning. This worked because
we finally allowed her to voice her opinion in her life goals and we listened.
Warrior Caregivers are able to establish strong communication skills between
themselves and the ones they are caring for.
Warrior Caregivers know:
* the importance of strong communication
* that all feelings must be spoken without fear from either party
* that unspoken words will lead to resentment and anger
* that they have to listen and try to find a solution
* that they need to form an empathetic connection
Warrior Caregivers know the importance of strong communication between themselves
and the ones receiving care. They know that without strong communication, there
will be feelings of resentment, anger, and frustration. They know
that all the feelings must be shared and there cannot be any fear of speaking
any of the feelings.
Warrior Caregivers know that they have to listen to what the ones receiving care
have to say. We may not always agree with some of the requests but we need to
listen without interrupting. We then have to be open to express our feelings and
thoughts even though they may contradict the spoken thoughts of those receiving the care.
Warrior Caregivers know that they need to listen and find solutions. They need
to form an empathetic connection so that neither party feels threatened
when they express their feelings.
With my daughter, we had to teach her how to cook, how to clean, and how to manage
her own money. We installed a call button so that if she had a medical problem that
she could get help. She successfully lived on her own for ten years.
She now lives with her boyfriend and is able to be a successful companion in his
home. If we had not listened to her requests, she would not be as independent today
as she is.
By recognizing the importance of communication, you have completed another important
step in becoming a strong Warrior Caregiver.
I invite you to come join us in the Warrior Caregiver Community
where we provide a safe platform for support & collaboration.
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