Consuelo Serbia's Blog

Dear God:

The lady reading this

is beautiful, classy and

strong, and I love her.

Help her live her life to the fullest.

Please promote her and

cause her to excel above her expectations.

Help her shine in the

darkest places where it is impossible to love.

Protect her at all

times, lift her up when she needs you the most,

you the most, and

let her know when she walks with you,

She will always be safe.



Love you Girl!!!!

Brave Heart Women-

This morning I keep hearing "The weight of your words".

Our words have the capability of helping to change our day. This can happen in a negative or postive way. Notice when you speak something negative about yourself or to some one else how heavy this can be. Its like an anchor that weighs us down from gliding in positivity, freedom and joy.

As a child growing up my sisters and I never heard nothing positive. It was either "Your too fat, your never going to make it, blah blah blah". What ended up happening was we believed this, we acted on it and it eventually transformed us.

Really think about that what we say we are we eventually become, who we say we are we become. Who we tell our children they are they become.

This can happen unintentionally. If you pay attention long enough you'll be able to hear your heart. "Out of the abundance of your heart your mouth speaks"

This morning I challenge you to really listen to what you are saying. Turn the negative around into a positive and see how you will change from being heavy to being free...

Hello Brave Heart Women-

Isn't it funny how we as women are so quick to believe all the negative reports?

If we were in this state when someone approaches us and says "Wow, you look nice today" our response would be something like "I look disgusting, don't you see that?" or "Tell the truth, thats not what you really think" Instead of responding "Thanks, I appreciate that"

In order for us to attract people who will believe in us we first have to believe in ourselves. We have to be able to look in the mirror and know how special we are.

It took me years to figure out how uniquely gifted I really was. The process was long and difficult only because I made it so difficult. People would try to affirm me and I knew who the Bible said I was but I had no faith in myself. I continuosly fell but got right back up and tried again.

One of my first steps was simply waking up in the morning and saying "You are valueable, you are special, you are one of a kind". As I continued doing this I was being divinely connected with people who share the same gifts and talents as I. My faith in myself had increased. My faith in people had grown to an all time high.

If you are in a place where you have believed the negative reports, its time you start believing how special you are. Brave Heart Women believe in you.

Here are some simple steps that would help you along the way:

1. First thing when you open your eyes be grateful and give thanks.

2. Confess how valueable you are. Say aloud "I'm unique, one of a kind"

3. Look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself "I am beautiful"

4. Tell yourself I believe in myself and I believe that their are people who believe in me as well.

5. Right down one thing you want to improve on for that day.
Example: "I want to smile more today"

Have fun, don't be like me and make this more complicated than it has to be. Enjoy your journey to becoming a women of influence.

Sincerely,

Consuelo Serbia
www.influentialwomentoday.com

Hello My Wonderful Brave Heart Women-

This journey has been absolutely amazing. One thing I was always guilty of was being busy saving the world. I thought I had Wonder Woman Power to rescue everyone. Well, burn out, fatigue and illness were sure to follow that motto.

I've learned from many Brave Heart Women, that I've met along this journey, the importance of taking time for yourself. Its okay to be a little selfish with yourself. When we are able to do this we can add more value to someone elses life. I thank you Brave Heart Women.

When you listen long enough your able to learn things that will open doors of oppurtunity, build new and revived relationships, and give you a freedom that is beyond any explanation that I can give.

Then the secret would be to take action. Take action on the things you've learned. Apply them to your lives so that you will become a blessing to so many others. One thing I found is when you are aligned with women that share your same vision, same same passion, same dreams the joy that comes with that is endless.

Thank You Brave Heart Women!

Last month we went through the first phase of change. Recontemplation which is the denial phase. If we are not satisfied with where we are at in life we must first come to that place of acceptance. We have to tell ourselves “Something needs to change” or “I need to change” Which brings us to the second phase in change.

Contemplation is defined in the webster dictionary as 1. concentration on spiritual things as a form of private devotion b: a state of mystical awareness of God's being 2. an act of considering with attention: STUDY 3. Act of regarding steadily 4. INTENTION, EXPECTATION.

This place in change is vital. I especially like the definition which states “a form of private devotion”. This could mean a number of things to you. Think about what private devotion means to you.

In having to come to a place in my life where change was needed I had to make every effort to devote my time, my mind and soul to seeking change. Again this is not an easy process and at times I did get discouraged. I had to press through these times in my life. I refused to give up. I have to devote my time to studying and seeking answers. The Bible says “Wisdom is a hidden treasure”. Its is up to me to find it out as I would a precious stone.

What is it in your life that you want changed? Is it your attitude? Is it your lifestyle? Is it your spiritual growth? Are you easily angered? Do you find what people say dictates your attitude? Is it hard for you to say no? Only you know what needs to change.

If your at this state in your life I applaud you today. You are beginning to hold yourself accountable. To often we wait for someone else to tell us what we need to change & do . We have the answers right infront of us. Take a look in the mirror and ask yourself “What do I need to change?” The answer will be staring back at you. Accept it and do something about it. Make it happen! You can do it.

Be diligent in seeking the answers you need to make this change. Here are some steps to help you.

Application Steps:

1. Accountability- Begin to say to yourself that you are not satisfied where you at and want change. Accept the fact that you do need change. Its not to late. Pick one friend, that one person you can trust and tell them this area you want to change. Give them permission to hold you accountable. Everyone needs that one person that can set us straight and help us get back on the right path.

2. Relationships- Start looking at your relationships. Are the people you surround yourself edifying to your being? Do they build you up or break you down? Do they have hopes and dreams? Are they positive? If your surrounded my gossipers, nay sayers, people who don't dream. Guess what its time to make a change in this area.

3. Study- Begin to do some research on the areas you struggle. If you struggle with anger or drepression read scriptures that target those specific areas. There are also many great books on personal development. My favorite books are the Bible, Lies Women Believe & the Truth by Beth Moore that sets them free, Becoming a Women of Influence by Carol Kent, 360 Degree Leader by John Maxwell. There are great books out there on personal development that can help you along the way. Never stop reading and seeking wisdom. This is a life long process.

4. Time- Start off by taking 15 minutes a day to yourself. To sit in silence. Take this time to speak life to yourself. Tell yourself “I can change” “I can get over this” “I can do greater things” You might have to let some things go at this stage. Do it, you have nothing to lose and a whole lot to gain. We are always so quick to point out the negative about ourselves. You are important, there is something in you that we need. You have a unique gift and its time you found it.

5. Confess- Confess what it is you want to overcome. What do I mean by that? Start speaking as if that very thing you want changed has already happened. If you struggle with depression start saying "I am free from depression." Giving thanks at all times for the freedom that you are experiencing. It has now become a habit for me the minute I open my eyes, I take a deep breath and give thanks that I'm alive yet another day. This has been a tremendous change in my life. Now I wake up and before I place one foot out of bed, I'm energetic, I'm smiling, I know I have purpose.

Remember you are responsible for yourself. You are responsible for your actions. Its time to take charge and make a CHANGE!

Change
03/07/09
By Consuelo Serbia


This morning I sat in a meeting and the instructor was speaking on change. As I listened in on the class my mind was thinking “Change in our walk with the Lord”, “Change in our relationships”, “Change in our behavior” or what about “Change in our lifestyles”.

Lets face it sometimes things are just comfortable right where we are at. Why change it?

The instructor speak on Recontemplation phase- Denial

We think to ourselves “I don’t need change I’ve been like this for so many years, why should I change now?” “This is where I’ve always been in my relationship with God and this is where I’m going to stay.”

With this type of attitude it hinders us from tapping into our full potential. Change is good. It’s the process that can be very demanding and painful. When we make the decision to stay right where we are at. The consequences may be severe.

Quote from Anais Nin:
Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.
When we refuse to change we are saying “I’m just going to settle.” ‘To change now would be too hard.’ My teacher once told me “Once you understand that life is hard things will be that much easier”
What are some reasons that people stay at this phase in their lives?
·Fear of the unknown
·Fear of the responsibility
·Fear of failure

Fear of the Unknown-
Why would we fear the unkown? Well that’s simple because we don’t know the outcome. We don’t know how its going to effect our lives. Have you ever thought about how your decision may affect another person’s life. Did you know that your destiny is tied in to many other people’s lives? If you didn’t, now you do. There is someone that needs you to overcome fear. Their destiny is tied to you.

Fear of the Responsibility-
One of my favorite scriptures in the bible is “To much is given much is required”. That means there comes a level of responsibility with what we are given. Take for instance you come before God and submit a prayer petition “God please bless my finances so I can be self employeed”. You receive this blessing from God. Now your have a responsibility as the Bible says “To be fruitful & multiply” to be a “faithful steward to what you have been given” God may be calling you to help someone in need, He may be tugging at your heart to start a business that would help homeless men/women. The fear of responsibility & work that comes along with that can keep us right where we are at. Just surviving. I don’t know about you but just surviving is not enough anymore.

Fear of Failure-
This is a big one. Our attitude on failure is important. It is my job to help you to understand that failure could be a good thing. Why? You tried, it didn’t work out, now try something else. This is not easy. Failure can build your character if you allow it. You see we have the capability of turning a negative into a positive. It is often said by my Pastor “If your going to fall, fall forward” this will bring you that much closer to your destiny”. If we begin to embrace areas in our lives where we “think” we failed as an area that you can improve and seek the steps to get there, you have now determined to make this a stepping stone into your Destiny.

I encourage you today to ask yourself “Am I in the Recontemplation phase- Denial?” If you are begin to speak to yourself until you believe that “Change is Good”.

I have found that this word has a lot of power. As a matter of fact I LOVE the word influence.

What does the word influence mean to you? Below is how the Webster’s Dictionary defines Influence.

1 a: an ethereal fluid held to flow from the stars and to affect the actions of humans b: an emanation of occult power held to derive from stars2: an emanation of spiritual or moral force3 a: the act or power of producing an effect without apparent exertion of force or direct exercise of command b: corrupt interference with authority for personal gain4: the power or capacity of causing an effect in indirect or intangible ways : SWAY5: one that exerts influence
Synonyms INFLUENCE , AUTHORITY , PRESTIGE , WEIGHT , CREDIT mean power exerted over the minds or behavior of others. INFLUENCE may apply to a force exercised and received consciously or unconsciously <used her influence to get the bill passed>. AUTHORITY implies the power of winning devotion or allegiance or of compelling

Did you know that you could influence people’s lives? Did you know that you have the power to change the attitude of your surroundings?

How?

1. Pay attention to this- When we speak negatively it sets the tone in the environment we are in. If we wake up every morning dreading the day, complaining about our job or chores, how do you think this is going to influence your day. You got it.. The day will be long, you will be aggravated all day long. Right when we open our eyes its time to make a decision. This morning I woke up cranky as I layed in bed giving thanks literally pushing past that negative feeling. At the same time my oldest daughter was screaming & crying because of her foot, the youngest was vomitting on the floor next to me as I was doing my hair, then I stepped in it. At that point what decision do you think I made? I made a decision to laugh because I refused to allow my day to be influenced by what was going on around me.

2. Speak positively, Give thanks. Making the conscious decision when we open our eyes to give thanks to another day is crucial. Being thankful for a jobs (there are many that aren’t working right now), as you stretch look at your arms, hands, fingers, legs, feet, I don’t know about you but that’s something I’m thankful for every day. You opened your eyes? Wow... There’s something else to be thankful about.

3. Choosing to Smile can set the tone for that day. Try it... Smile at 10 people you don’t know and see how this could change the tone for your day. At the very same time your mood is changing your helping someone’s day become a little bit better.

4. Actions- The way we carry ourselves, our body language. People are always watching. There might be someone who is watching because they need what you have. What do I mean by that: If you’re excited about the day people will be attracted to that? Deep down inside they’ll want to know “What is she/he so happy about?” There is a saying that goes like those “I’ll tell you who you are by the company you keep.” If you’re surrounded by negativity, complainers, nah Sayers, gossipers, guess what. (Birds of a feather flock together) RUN! DON’T LOOK BACK!!! Make a decision to go against the current. Not to conform or settle.

I remember one day at work everyone was stressing because we weren’t going to get raises. I sat at my desk and was laughing and smiling. At that time I made a decision that nothing was going to steal my Joy. Not for me but for those that are in need. Someone had approached me and asked “Why are you so happy? Don’t you know whets happening?” I turned looked her in the face with a huge smile and excitement in my voice & said “Yes, Don’t you know whets happening?” You see I’ve made a decision to Influence lives.

5. Motives- Yep, you got it motives have influence. The motives of your heart will determine the out come on how you influence lives. This is some serious stuff. Positive motives have positive effects. If look past your needs to help someone else. The return will be far greater than you’ve ever imagined. If you are looking to help someone get on their feet, teach them the right way, encourage them. Your return may not be monetary but to see that individual dream and be filled with Joy will be motivation enough for you.

If your motive are to be recognized, noticed, or promoted on your own accord you’re truly setting yourself up for failure. Life isn’t always about our wants & our desires. Sometimes the very thing we want keeps us from truly fulfilling the true purpose in our lives. The very things we want are not necessities but desires. That’s a whole other class.

Today my motive is to encourage you to make the conscience decision to Influence lives. You are here today for a Purpose! Tap into your Dream. Tap into that one thing that drives you and as my Pastor always says “Make it Happen”. You have the power to Influence your surroundings, your life & the lives of others.

One more thing that … Take the time to celebrate those that have Influenced your life. Remember it’s not always about you!

I believe in you!

Have you ever gotten to a place in your life where you hit a brick wall? Have you ever feel like you had no purpose? Well that is a lie.

Our church had a series on "Reaching Your Dreams". I remember crying non stop because we were asked for our childhood dreams. I could not remember mine. Through the busyness of life I forgot my dream.

Today I deal with many different women from all kinds of backgrounds. Some "think" they are very successful, others are dealing with serious issues such as drug addiction, depression, etc.. Some where along the line they forgot their dreams. Or they are trying to live out the dreams someone else had for them. Why is that?

When we dream it drives us, motivates us and pushes us to find ways to accomplish those dreams. We don't have time to be depressed or try to fill ours lives with things of the world that would only keep us down. Dreaming is part of our Destiny. Without the dream how will you have an idea of your destiny.

Its never to late to dream. Its time to dream again, live again and believe again. I heard someone say this past weekend "It's one thing when one person believes in you, but when you begin to believe in yourself, thats when all kinds of doors begin to open."

I was having a conversation with my mentor and he posed a mind boggling question. He asked me "Connie, what is the securist place in the world". I was stumped and couldn't come up with anything. Knowing him I knew I had to think outside of the box. My response was "I don't know, please tell me what the securist place in the world is." He said a prison. In a maximum security facility the inmates lose their freedom.

The moral of the story is this many people would just settle for security. Not realizing that the very things they find security in can very well be their prison. They would stay in a place that is familiar because fear parolizes them from moving beyond the now.

We can't allow fear or doubt to cripple us from moving beyond the walls of our mind and moving forward into our destiny. We can't even settle for those things that we are familiar with. Lately I've been praying to be disturbed, shaken in the weee hours of the night because I know there is something more.

We are all at the right place with www.BraveHeartWomen.com. There are so many tools and resources that would help us on our journey to live a life of FREEDOM and true Joy.

I can't wait to see what is in store.

Luv U Brave Heart Women!

Have you ever wanted to fit in? Have you ever wanted to be a part of something? Did you think that because you did not fit in you were not valueable?

I remember there was a time where I just wanted to fit in. I knew exactly what to say and do to make that happen. A women like me who never had love or acceptance was longing for that from "people". Not realizing that I was setting myself up for great disappointment.

Once I was with the "IN CROWD", I was really an outcast. It was very uncomfortable because I did not fit in. I was the one person that would do whatever no one else wanted to do. I wanted to show them that I was one of them and that I did fit in. I allowed people to control me, belittle me, use me and not allow me to grow. My past mistakes were used against me to keep me from believing that I was a New Creation.

One day I walked into church filled with grief. The preacher was speaking on "He Knows Your Name" She was speaking on the women in the bible named Mary Magdalene.(That is my story) Long story short Mary was known as an "outcast". She was a prostitute and delivered by Jesus from 7 demons. As I sat there listening to this story I remember crying like I never did before. It was almost as if that message was tailored for me. The preacher was talking about how special Mary was to Jesus. She had a love for Him like no other and He the same for her. At that moment I embraced the fact that I did not fit in, I was unique and there was greatness in store for me. It didn't matter what people said about me, all that mattered was that He loved me, He saved me, He's given me another chance at life.

If you feel that you don't belong with a certain crowd you probably don't. Why? Because your unique, you are created for greatness. Choose to stand with your head held high knowing and believing that God has Greatness in store for you.

I encourage you today to soar with the Eagles, embrace your uniqueness, your calling and your dreams. There is no other person in this world like YOU!

Be Blessed