I’ve watched “the Secret” a couple of times and what I got out of it is essentially, what we visualize and charge with emotion becomes our reality. At 3:30 Wednesday morning, while I was standing outside in the dark completely amazed, that message went from just head knowledge to an epiphany. The painting I was working on and the process of painting were the catalysts for my epiphany.
I started a painting of myself with Sue, my 27-year-old mare, who has been having neurological issues. I needed an image of what I wanted, so I could better visualize it. I had been feeling a lot of pressure to euthanize Sue, but I felt she could get better, so I wanted to hear what Sue wanted so I would know what to do. I drew a coiled snake, (a symbol of the medical profession), wrapped around my body and talking in my ear, to represent the opinion of the vets who think she will never get better. I drew Sue talking in my other ear.
When I saw how uncoordinated Sue was at times, I began to worry that she would lose the ability to get up. In the back of my mind was that we had to euthanize her mother at 32, when she no longer could get up after she lay down. I started to get up and check her throughout the night and I entered a negative spiral of sleep deprivation and intense worry and fear. The more I worried about Sue, the more she deteriorated. She lost the ability to get up without help. I had completely charged my fearful thoughts about Sue with intense negative emotion and she gave me back what I was creating. On some intellectual level I was aware that I might be playing a role in her deterioration, but I was not able to break this pattern. I had unconsciously created exactly what I didn’t want.
Remember in the last article I mentioned that it is the process not what you create that is important? Art making brings what is unconscious to our conscious mind. I had been missing my painting class, because I didn’t want to leave Sue for more than a couple of hours, but I had someone who agreed to call me if she lay down, so I went. The painting process shifted something in me and when I went to bed that night it occurred to me that if I visualized Sue getting up by herself and being mobile enough to go out in the pasture and graze and I charged these images with positive emotion, perhaps this would become reality. I visualized this and felt joy at seeing Sue better and I went to sleep (and forgot all about it.)
When I checked her at 3:00 am she was laying down and shivering, so I got help and as I was putting on her halter so we could help her up, she started getting up. She then got up without help and trotted off through the snow to the far end of her paddock. She has not been leaving the shelter area much, as off and on she has been having trouble walking. I have not seen her trot for a long time. My heart leaped for joy and I remembered that I had visualized this a few hours earlier. Now overflowing with joy instead of worry, fear and doubt, I could really consciously create. I visualized her walking confidently through her pasture and effortlessly getting up after lying down. I ran this sequence like a filmstrip through my mind over and over. The change in Sue has been miraculous! Overnight her behavior and coordination dramatically changed. She now is walking all over her paddock, getting up without help every time, grazing through the snow and basically behaving like a normal horse. Today she met me at the fence, something she hasn’t done in months.
You have the power to create heaven or hell. Why not choose heaven?
What do you want to consciously create? It’s OK if you have no idea, just start by creating anything and you will begin to connect to your higher self. Symbols may emerge from your unconscious that will give you clues. Put them in your work and later look them up and see what deeper meaning they contain that you resonate with. Go with what makes you feel good, what has your attention. Listen to your heart, follow your passions, have fun and lighten up. Don’t judge the work, but trust the process, take chances, create on the edge of possibility, work with your mistakes to create something even better… Art is a metaphor for life.
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