To all of my Braveheart Sisters - This is my wish for you: comfort on difficult days,smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you are in doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, love to complete your life. --Anonymous
Remember our soldier's this Christmas. Here's a poem I think is worth sharing:
Merry Christmas, My Friend
'Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone, In a one bedroom house made of plaster and stone. I had come down the chimney with presents to give, And to see just who in this home did live.
As I looked all about, a strange sight I did see, No tinsel, no presents, not even a tree. No stocking by mantle, just boots filled with sand, On the wall hung pictures of far distant lands.
With medals and badges, awards of all kinds, A sober thought came through my mind. For this house was different, it was dark and dreary, I’d found the home of a soldier, once I could see clearly.
The soldier lay sleeping, silent, alone, Curled up on the floor in this one bedroom home. The face was so gentle, the room in such disorder, Not how I pictured a United States Soldier.
Was this the hero of whom I’d just read, Curled upon a poncho, the floor for a bed? I realized the families that I was visiting this night, Owed their lives to these soldiers who were willing to fight.
Soon ‘round the world the children would play, And grown-ups would celebrate a bright Christmas day. They all enjoyed freedoms each month of the year, Because of the soldiers, like the one lying here.
I couldn’t help wonder how many lie alone, On a cold Christmas Eve, in a land far from home. The very thought brought a tear to my eye, I dropped to my knees and started to cry.
The soldier awakened and I heard a rough voice, "Santa, don’t cry, this life is my choice. I fight for freedom, I don’t ask for more, My life is my God, my Country, my Corps."
The soldier rolled over and drifted to sleep, I couldn’t control it, I continued to weep. I kept watch for hours, so silent and still, And we both shivered from the cold night’s chill.
I didn’t want to leave, on that cold, dark night, This Guardian of Honor, so willing to fight. Then the soldier rolled over, and with a voice soft and pure, Whispered, "Carry on Santa, it’s Christmas Day. All is secure."
One look at my watch and I knew he was right, "Merry Christmas my friend, and May God Bless You This Night."
If you haven’t all the things you want, be grateful for the things you don’t have that you wouldn’t want. -Unknown
Be Thankful
Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire. If you did, what would there be to look forward to? Be thankful when you don’t know something, for it gives you the opportunity to learn.
Be thankful for the difficult times. During those times you grow. Be thankful for your limitations, because they give you opportunities for improvement. Be thankful for each new challenge, because it will build your strength and character.
Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons. Be thankful when you’re tired and weary, because it means you’ve made a difference.
It’s easy to be thankful for the good things. A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks. Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive. Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings. -author unknown
He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has. –Epictetus
What good is sitting alone in your room?
Come hear the music play.
Life is a Cabaret, old chum,
Come to the Cabaret.
Put down the knitting,
The book and the broom.
It’s time for a holiday.
Life is Cabaret, old chum,
Come to the Cabaret.
What good’s admitting
Some prophet of doom
To wipe every smile away.
Life is a Cabaret, old chum,
So come to the Cabaret!
-partial lyrics to “Cabaret”
Are you saying “YES” to life? Or are you stuck in a rut – doing the same thing over and over? Have you lost your “Joie de vivre” (Joy of Living)?
Earlier this year I saw the movie “Yes Man.” This comedy stars Jim Carrey as Carl Allen, a guy whose life is going nowhere—the operative word being no—until he signs up for a self-help program based on one simple covenant: say yes to everything and anything. At the start of the movie we see how Carl has cut himself off from his friends and is living a dull, uneventful life. His daily routine pretty much consists of him going to work and coming home. He avoids his friends, won’t take their phone calls, and sits at home alone night after night. Unleashing the power of YES begins to transform Carl’s life in amazing and unexpected ways, getting him promoted at work and opening the door to a new romance.
Although the movie character went to extremes saying “Yes” to everything, the point of the movie was in how saying “Yes” his life was transformed for the better — and it can do the same for you. Of course this means using some common sense.
Remember the saying – “If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.”
Think about it: How often do you say “No” to trying something new, going new places, or getting together with friends? Are you turning down party invitations because you won’t know anyone other than the host? Are you refraining from joining a club just because you don’t have a friend to join with you?
Take steps to put some zest back into your life!
Life is too short to be sitting in your room.
“Get busy living, or get busy dying.” -Andy Dufresne, “The Shawshank Redemption”
“Yes Man” is funny and downright silly at times, but worth watching – if just for the inspiration.
“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” -Albert Einstein
Are you doing the same things, the same way, over and over again and expecting different results?
I stumbled across this poem, “There’s A Hole In My Sidewalk,” by Portia Nelson. The poem creates an analogy between life and a journey down a sidewalk. This made me think about the choices we make in life. How many times do we keep making choices that only lead us into the same “hole in the sidewalk?”
There’s A Hole In My Sidewalk – by Portia Nelson
Chapter One I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost… I am helpless. It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter Two I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t believe I am in the same place. But it isn’t my fault. It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter Three I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in… it’s a habit. My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault… I get out immediately.
Chapter Four I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.
Chapter Five I walk down another street.
Portia Nelson (1920 – 2001) was a renaissance woman: author, singer, composer, lyricist, painter, photographer, and actress. Over the years she wrote the music and lyrics for many revues, television specials, and films. Portia authored the much-loved book “There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery,” originally published in the 1970’s. There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk was made into a musical based on the book, and Portia directed, created the music and lyrics, and performed in the production at the York Theatre in Manhattan. This amazing poem has been praised by psychotherapists, metaphysicians, and legions of fans from every walk of life. It is used in numerous 12-step substance-abuse programs, and has been quoted in such diverse books as “The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying,” and the preface of “My Lives,” Roseanne’s best-selling autobiography. It also appears on a poster in Dr. Maguire’s office (Robin Williams) in the film Good Will Hunting (1997). John Gray, Ph.D., author of “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus,” says: “There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk” explains in a simple and concise way, how life works. It is full of practical wisdom that will allow you to embrace and change your life.”
Are you doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results?
“Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.” –Norman Vincent Peale
“If you want to be confident, but don’t normally act that way, today, just this once, act in the physical world the way you believe a confident person would.” –Wayne Dyer
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” –Ralph Waldo Emerson
What does not destroy me, makes me strong. -Friedrich Nietzsche
A friend of mine shared this story with me about adversity. Read it and see if you can identify how you respond to adversity.
A carrot, an egg, and a cup of coffee…
A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up; She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.
Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.
In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.
Turning to her daughter, she asked, ‘Tell me what you see.’ ‘Carrots, eggs, and coffee,’ she replied. Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, ‘What does it mean, Mother?’
Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however, after they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water. ‘Which are you?’ she asked her daughter. ‘When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?’
Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?
Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?
Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest do I elevate to another level?
Humm? How do I handle adversity? Am I a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?
May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy. The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; one can’t go forward in life until they let go of their past failures and heartaches.
There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in storm. -Willa Cather
We all have fears. Are you letting your fears hold you back from fully enjoying life, from getting what you want in life?
Ever since I heard it, I’ve loved “Our Deepest Fear.” It was presented as a short poem in the movie “Akeelah and the Bee.” It actually came from the book “A Return to Love,” by Marianne Williamson.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” –Marianne Williamson
Take a few minutes and think about it. What fears do you have? How are your fears impacting your life?
“Don’t fear failure so much that you refuse to try new things. The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.” — Louis E. Boone
"Education comes from within; you get it by struggle and effort and thought." –Napoleon Hill
Here's a story about "Life Struggles" that I thought was worth sharing with you. It gives you one perspective on the purpose of our struggles. Hope you enjoy it.
Life Struggles
A man found a cocoon of an emperor moth. He took it home so that he could watch the moth come out of the cocoon. On the day a small opening appeared, he sat and watched the moth for several hours as the moth struggled to force the body through that little hole.
Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther. It just seemed to be stuck. Then the man, in his kindness, decided to help the moth, so he took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The moth then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings. The man continued to watch the moth because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened! In fact, the little moth spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It was never able to fly.
What the man, in his kindness and haste did not understand, was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the moth to get through the tiny opening, was the way of forcing fluid from the body of the moth into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon. Freedom and flight would only come after the struggle. By depriving the moth of a struggle, he deprived the moth of health.
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If we were to go through life without any obstacles, we would be crippled. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. Give every opportunity a chance, leave no room for regrets.
“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.” –Anonymous
“We must always change, renew, rejuvenate ourselves; otherwise we harden.” –Johann von Goethe
“Create a definite plan for carrying out your desire and begin at once, whether you’re ready or not, to put this plan into action.” –Napoleon Hill
“Edison failed 10,000 times before he made the electric light. Do not be discouraged if you fail a few times.” –Napoleon Hill
“Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn’t learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful.” –Buddha
Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit. --Conrad Hilton
The next time you feel discouraged, or feel like giving up, watch this video.
Thoughts are powerful! We all have thoughts running around in our head. We get upset about something and we just dwell on it. Then we tell our friends, and we dwell on it some more. But some thoughts we don’t tell others. Like the negative things we say to ourselves. How many times do we challenge our thoughts? Why do we keep dwelling on thoughts of a past event that are painful to us? The past is over but we keep reliving it, keep it alive in our mind. And it feels like the event/situation is happening to us all over again. We never let it go. You are not your thoughts. Become aware of what you are thinking. Stop yourself if it is painful, unless you just like torturing yourself. You are living in the past. Or maybe you’ve projected yourself into the future and you are worrying about something that you don’t even know will happen. Free yourself. Live in the present, in the now! How? Read Eckhart Tolle’s book, “The Power of Now.” I read the book years ago and continually practice what the author said to do and it works! I’d catch myself thinking a painful thought, or worrying about something, and then ask myself, “do you want pain or pleasure?” When my mind was insistent upon thinking a particular thought I’d just say to myself, “ok, you’ve got 2 minutes to go on with this line of thinking.” Then I would redirect my thoughts. If I couldn’t come up with something pleasant to think about, I’d think about something that wasn’t painful, like, what I was going to cook for dinner the next night. That led me down a different path of thinking. Read the book and find what works for you. It helped me immensely. Focusing on the negative only draws more of the same into your life. When you are not caught up in misery and worry, you can begin to focus on things, or the life that you do want, and make it happen.
“Watch your thoughts….your thoughts become your words, Watch your words….your words become your actions, Watch your actions…your actions become your habits, Watch your habits….your habits become your character, Watch your character…your character becomes your destiny.” — Frank Outlaw
Have you ever taken the time to just stop and think about the things your mother has taught you?
On Mother's Day many people take the time to express how great their mothers are and how much they love them. I happen to feel the same way about mine -- but not everyone thinks their mom is the greatest. Regardless of whether your feelings are positive or negative towards your mother, I'm sure she taught you lifeskills and things about life. In honor of my mother, here is a list of some of the things my mother has taught me:
1 - How to love - showing others you love them through your actions
2 - Be quiet and listen to others
3 - Patience with others
4 - Acceptance - how to let others be who they are
5 - Kindness - be kind to others
6 - Manners
7 - Be helpful
8 - Be supportive of others
9 - Be independent - be able to support yourself financially
10 - How to be a wife
11 - How to care for others
12 - How to put others needs first
13 - How to live a balanced life - there's a time for work and a time for play
14 - How not to cry over spilt milk - move on, life goes on
15 - How to be angry and still do what needs to be done, or what is expected
16 - How to shop
17 - How to cook; How to cook balanced meals
18 - How to entertain - how to make others feel welcome in your home
19 - How to do what needs to be done without waiting for someone else to do it
20 - How to give good gifts - give gifts designed with the person (recipient) in mind
21 - You mess it up, you clean it up - everyone needs to pick up after themselves
22 - Communication - remain calm and talk it out, no need to shout
23 - How to work together, how to work as a team in a relationship
24 - Broaden your horizens
25 - You are responsible for your own happiness
So, in honor of your mother, please take a few minutes and think - What are some things your mother has taught you?
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