MarciaL9's Blog

Today it is twelve years since my Dad transitioned to another part in his journey. It seems like just yesterday I followed the funeral home personnel out to the street silently crying, “Come back, come back”, as they wheeled my father to their van. However, my eleven year old niece and ten year old son are testament to the marching on of time. My father would have been delighted with the two of them and their childhood antics. I remember my the day of my Dad’s funeral being a sad farewell but a few weeks later I received a picture snapped by one of my aunts of me with this huge cake eating grin. The picture was taken at a family gathering after the funeral and I was between bites of black forest cake. I framed the picture to remind me that even on the saddest of days I can find joy, joy in being with family, joy in memories of a life well lived and joy in a good chunk of cake. Dad always believed life is for the living and seized life for the adventure it was to him and is to me. My Dad was proactive and progressive. Social media would have totally tickled him with its ability to communicate with people all over the world. My Dad did more for his kids in regards to being globally aware than any social studies class. Many times through-out the past twelve years I’ve wondered, “What would Dad have had to say about this?” Life has gone on but it would have been more interesting having my father here to bounce ideas off of, have stimulating conversations with, go canoeing and hike trails with. I know this is not the end. He and I will talk and walk together again but for now I’m missing you, Dad.

I used to buy into the madness of the Christmas rush – trying to find the perfect present for everyone on my list, write the perfect message in each card I sent out, decorate the perfect Christmas tree, set the perfect table for the perfect Christmas dinner. All this need for things to be just so for un-perfect me made cause for some serious stress at Christmas time.
I have two sons, born twelve years apart. On the Christmas when my second son was two years old we began decorating the perfect Christmas tree that we had actually groomed throughout the past year so it would be perfect. As my toddler started placing decorations haphazardly on the tree I felt some pressure rising up the back of my neck. I took a decoration out of his little hands and told him firmly that I would show him where each decoration went and then he could place them there. I heard my fourteen year old, Kyle, from the other side of the tree say, “Here we go.” I heard my husband snap his newspaper and then I looked down at my little son, Cole: He had his hands cupped open and was looking up at me with his big, blue eyes watering-up. Now that was an “Ah, ha!”, moment for me. I handed Cole back the decoration and said, “Mom needs a time out – you guys decorate however you want.” At the time we were living in the country very close to the south shore of Slave Lake. I sat at my kitchen table looking out the window facing the lake where I could see Christmas lights flickering in the dark. I could hear my two sons laughing with their dad. After awhile Kyle came into the kitchen and said, “Mom, come see.” I went into the living-room to see the most beautifully decorated Christmas tree ever. No, it wasn’t perfect or balanced but that didn’t matter. What mattered is it was decorated with love and laughter by my family. Kyle said, “We left some for you.” He handed me the small box of decorations a friend of mine had given me over the years which I lovely placed on the tree thinking of her and days gone by which tied us to the present.
I don’t know for me when or how Christmas came to be about everything being perfectly done. I do know the when and how Christmas went back to being about love, laughter, family, and peace.
That Christmas morning when we sat near the tree reading the Christmas story before opening presents I remember being so grateful for the lesson learned that freed me to just go with the flow and let the need for perfection just slide away. Now when asked, “Are you ready for Christmas?”, I ask back, “What does that mean for you?”
May the Peace and Joy of this season abide with all of you now and through- out the New Year!

A while back we were asked what the definition is of a BraveHeart Women. I answered by telling a little of my mother’s inspiring story. My mom is a courageous, innovative, get’er done, problem solver who succeeds with grace and elegance. She is also the person who will do what needs doing even if it is an icky, dirty job.

There have been many times over the years when I have been in a situation and thought, “What would Mom do?” Mostly, I would answer myself, “Glad I’m not her. I’m not doing that”, and slink away.

Yesterday I didn’t have the option. I had dyed my hair and was waiting the 35 minutes to wash it out. I decided to go down to the basement to get pork chops out for supper. As I approached the basement stairs I could hear the sound of rain. I turned on the light – Water was spraying everywhere! Last winter a frozen sump pump hose had been re-routed to go down the drain in our house. This past spring the hose was re-routed again so the water would go outside. The connection was sealed with duct tape. I won’t name names but it was the other adult who lives in this house who did the fixer-upper. Water was shooting straight into the air like a fountain! I didn’t think but grabbed a rubber maid storage container and dumped it out. Since last spring boxes and junk had been stacked between the rest of the basement and the sump hole so I quickly cleared a path. Using the rubber maid container as a particle shield I made my way to the fountain. I did think to unplug the pump but didn’t want to chance that as water sprayed everywhere. Fortunately, my husband is one for not putting his tools away so there was an exacto knife laying right there on the floor by the sump hole. No-longer thinking I shoved the rubber maid container close to the spraying pipe and started hacking away at the duct tape so the water would run down and not be spraying every which way. It wasn’t until I felt my eyes stinging that I remembered the hair dye on my head. (You know it says on the box that getting this stuff in your eyes can cause blindness) I almost stopped right then and there but knew I couldn’t do that, this was my basement, my boxes of Christmas decorations, my boxes of books and resources. I wiped the dye from my eyes and went back at that pipe with the exacto knife. Of course my face was close to my work and once I hacked a big enough hole I got a full blast of dirty ground water right in my face soaking me from head to toe. (Think funniest home videos!) Finally, the water was running down and not spraying everywhere. I unplugged the pump, spread towels and blankets on the floor and wiped off a few boxes. Then I phoned my husband – fortunately for him and me all I got was his answering machine. Dripping ground water and hair dye I made my way to the shower - rinsed out of my hair and blow dried it.

The tragedy of this story is not the mess that needs cleaning-up or the boxes of decorations and crap I have to go through but that my hair is this awful, dirty blonde color having been left on my head to long and thinned out by freezing cold ground water! Oh, and no pork chops for supper we had meat loaf.

Mom would be proud.

A few nights ago I dreamt I had gone to a fancy event with friends. Once in the parking lot I had tried to lock my vehicle but it wouldn’t lock so I hoped for the best and went into the event with my friends. I had tried on many dresses and lots of different shoes earlier that day and was looking pretty good in a blue sequined dress with my hair piled high on my head. During the event I started to get concerned about my unlocked car so went outside to check on it. By now it was dark out. I was walking through the parking lot making sure of being aware of my surroundings when I suddenly realized I was NAKED. What! I ran into the trees. Shocked, I snuck back into the hall to see if I could grab a table cloth, anything to cover up with. When I got inside my clothes were back on. Good enough. I went back into the main ballroom to find the people going through a lovely buffet which I joined and then found my friends. They hadn’t noticed I was missing but were happy to see me. After awhile I started thinking about my unlocked car so went outside. NAKED! Back inside – clothed, not just clothed but looking good, feeling good, good food, good friends, nice clothes. I stepped outside again – NAKED! Just checking. Back inside again. The dream faded then.
Late that day I had the time to listen to the Oct. 20th prosperity hormone call with Ellie. Vow! When Ellie talked about being aware of the subconscious intention possibly being in conflict with the conscious intention the dream became clear. My conscious intention is to move forward with my vision but my subconscious is saying, “You will be exposed, everyone will see you, it’s dark out there, stay inside with your friends, good food, good music, clothing – why leave your comfort zone? You have it good.” The unlocked car is me already having put myself out there, already having unlocked the doors, already having shared my vision with others. I have been having doubts and have heard myself say to myself, “This is bigger than you, this is to big for you.” Yes, it is and that is why I have been led to the BraveHeart Women site, a place where I can learn, share and collaborate.
I received so much out of the Oct. 20th prosperity hormone call with Ellie that I won’t share here but I will say that for me becoming a core member has been the best of investments. My learning curve is more like a rocket taking off. I am very grateful for everything I am learning and the motivation to put this learning into action.
MarciaL9

At RISE when Ellie unveiled her vision for world peace and introduced the musical component I was struck by the similarities with the Playing for Change Project. I bought the first CD and DVD set produced by Playing for Change, “Songs Around the World”. Then I bought more and handed them out like candy to anybody I thought would appreciate this profound demonstration of the power of music. When the Deluxe Edition came out I bought that too because I believe in “the power of music to break down boundaries and overcome distances between people.” As I took part in the oxytocin project I felt the power of like minded people focusing their intentions together for peace. There is a song on the Playing for Change CD called, “Love Rescue Me”, which is sung by a youth choir in Omagh, North Ireland. “The youth choir was established in 1998 after a tragic bombing terrorized the town. The choir director, Daryl J. Simpson, created the choir as a way to heal and unite the Catholic and Protestant people living in isolation from each other. The parents and the children themselves overcame their differences and now live in harmony through music.” I have watched the DVD more than a few times but for whatever reason did not click on the Extras but I did today. Norman Lear, one of the executive producers, said at the beginning of the Film Makers Journey, “When things are right with the moment it’s hard to tell whether it is leading or reflecting. That is true of Playing for Change, it is either leading or reflecting something that is going on but it is at one with the current that’s coming in as sure as the tide.” I feel this way about BraveHeart Women. There is no doubt in my mind that Ellie is an inspired, intuitive leader and we as BraveHeart Women and families are a part of this “current” Norman Lear speaks about.

I have been reading the book we were given at RISE, “BraveHeart Women How to be Inspiration in Action Volume 1,” and felt compelled to comment on a statement written by Rolonda Watts: “Happiness is a choice. People tell me, “You’re so happy.” I say, “It was a choice today –a conscious choice.””
This reminded me of what my mom would tell us kids, “You can have a bad moment but you don’t get to have a bad day.” I tell my own sons this same thing, stuff happens and you chose how to respond, you can be grumpy and share your bad mood with everyone you come in contact with or you can chose to deal with the situation and be grateful for the learning experience. I used to run a weekly moms group for pregnant and parenting teens. One day a co-worker said to me, “Well, you do have influence around here. I was grumbling about something that had happened earlier in the day and one of the girls said to me, “Marcia says, you can have a bad moment but you don’t get to have a bad day.” I asked her how she responded and my co-worker said, “I just grinned because the young mom looked and sounded just like you.” My mom’s philosophy lives on and spreads which I am sure was passed to her from another wise woman.
I love this book. Meriel Hemingway writes, “Just because I’m a celebrity doesn’t mean that I’m exempt from the ups and downs of life. Everybody has difficult life experiences to deal with.” Then Meriel goes on to share her personal growth. “It’s just about making conscious choices and being really aware of where you are and being honest about that.” There it is again – conscious choice. Meriel also writes: “Think about the amazing global impact we will have when all women connect with their inner teacher to find their authentic self ...” I think we got a taste of the impact we as grounded, empowered women can have during the ground breaking oxytocin experience at RISE. There are gems in this book, ours for the reading and embracing the parts that resonate with each of us. I am truly grateful to be a part of the BraveHeart Community. I’m not one for gushing but there it is.
On a side note, I am wondering if the BraveHeart Women book is going to be available before Christmas. I have a number of women on my list who would benefit from this book. I usually give subscriptions to O Magazine but this feels more appropriate this year. Sorry Oprah.

I just finished listening to Ellie’s call with Rolanda Watt’s for the first time and have been further inspired to continue to dream big. Rolanda said she does not buy into the whole economy is in a bad place. I’ve been told by a person in my life that I am just a worker and that I need to see reality, that my dream is just that a dream. There are houses on my street with foreclosure signs on them. That is suppose to be a sign of reality to me, to put me back in line, but I say, “That might be your reality but it is not mine!” I don’t buy into the struggling economy and I don’t buy into the concept of a hierarchy: only so many people get to be successful, only so many people get to prosper; only so many people get to live in abundance, only so many people get to a place where they can share their knowledge, wisdom and wealth. I have had people say to me, “I don’t have what you have.” My response is, “I bet you do and if you are open to believing that you can tap into it.” To me RISE is a gift from God/the Universe. Can you imagine if Ellie had not followed her passion, had not founded BraveHeart Women and brought us all together? While reading many of the introductions on the BraveHeart sight I have heard a common thread, “I stumbled onto this sight, I’m not sure how I got here but I am glad I did.” To me it looks like so many women from across the globe have been drawn to the BraveHeart Women Community, women who need to connect with each and move forward for the good of us all, for this place, our home, earth. I for one feel blessed and humbled to be a part of this event, RISE! (event seems like a small word) I think RISE is going to be the catalyst that moves us into a new realm of being, of connecting, of collaborating, of making a positive difference for our world! I am grateful to Ellie and the BraveHeart Team for all the work they have done to put RISE together. I look forward to meet and connecting with all of you!
Peace In and Out,
MarciaL9

Today I listened to Debra Wilson's call with Ellie for the first time. The call was recorded before I joined BraveHeart Women. At the end of the call Debra said we need to have a mantra. What popped into my head was, "This little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine!" I felt tears well up because this is the song I sang on my way to work for the last ten months of my job. I was singing this song for protection, I was singing it to keep things at bay. Today when this little light of mine popped into my head I realized that I have moved past that, been set free to now sing that song, take it as my mantra to openly and humbly share the light I have been given.
I look forward to RISE!
Marcia

Hi Ellie,
My name is Marcia Walker.
I am so excited about finding BraveHeart Women.
I truly believe that it is us women, as we join together, who are going to make huge positive changes in our world.

When I first listened to your morning affirmations I was so moved. I believe in the power of language and was thinking as I listened that these are words I use though much less eloquently.

Up until almost two months ago I ran a weekly support and educational Moms Group for Parenting Teens. About seven months into the group I decided to have each girl share at least one thing they are grateful for and why at the beginning of the group. After awhile there was an obvious shift in their attitudes about their lives.

Another thing the group agreed to was no gossip during group including celebrity gossip. That was a little harder to maintain but soon they were regulating what they spoke about themselves. I really enjoyed the work I was doing and know I was making a difference in the lives of the girls, their children and family.

Due to circumstances beyond my control I was set free to explore new possibilities. I discovered your web-site and have signed-up for RISE. I have what I think is an amazing idea. I have been looking for a mentor for many years and I loved what you said about connecting with people who have already done what I want to do. I am hoping that at RISE I receive the guidance and make those connections.

I was working on a vision board and then listened to your talk about personal and professional purpose being connected but are not the same thing. I am glad I listened before I started gluing. Lol

Everything I have heard regarding the affirmations and prosperity hormone resonate with me. This all makes sense to me.

I look forward to Rise!
Marcia Walker