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Sep 29, 2011 01:27 PM
I have been married for 20+ years and we have 3 beautiful children. We had companies worth a couple million until my M said we were broke and going bankrupt. His dad's company was bought by the company M began working for July 1, 2010 for $24M (who is/was working for a company $184M) My soon to be ex, I'll call M, transferred all our companies, assets and bank accounts to his hometown of PA from NC on December 3, 2008 without my knowledge and the help of our partner in one of the businesses. I am from a small town and have had 2 attorneys withdraw because of the 'complexity' of our divorce. He has promised to leave me a "bag lady on the street...". Unless I can empower myself with more knowledge I feel helpless, a sitting duck. He and our partner have called in false police reports and directing an on duty officer to come in (they gave him the combination) while I was alone at our private office and threatened me with arrest and terrorfied me into leaving. My first attorney said it was no big deal and my 2nd would not address it. When I went to our D.A. office and explained what happened they said they would get back. I have gone there twice and still not heard back. Is this a 'good 'ol boy club' or am I in the Twighlight Zone? Any advice or help is more than appreciated and needed....
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8 Comments
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I feel your pain. My husband left me after 22 years and I didn't see it coming. My son was grown so I didn't have to seek child support but I did get alimony. I was still in love with him so during the negotiations I went "easy" on him. My advise to you would be hire a good divorce lawyer. You need a good Lawyer, probably from out of town. Any monies that were gained during your marriage are community property and you are entitled to half. In my state you are also entitled in alimony for half the years of your marriage. So if you were married for 22 years, you are entitled to 11 years of alimony. You need to establish what you are entitled to. You can even do research to edify your self in this mess. |
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I know this hurts right now but the hurt will go away. I will share from experience. Interview competent attorneys and the one that you know intuitively is an aggressive "junkyard dog" is the one to hire. I did this for child support and found that when the attorney told me not to worry that she had my back, she was true to her word. My responsibility became to follow her instructions. (The first time i didn't, we had a come to reality meeting and I learned not to get on that side of her again). Needless to say, there were many court times and meetings. His assets were found, and other things were uncovered that led to my receiving exactly what I asked for. From the spiritual place, I asked Spirit to avenge me of this wrong doing. I feel that happened. Please follow the advice given by the sisters, get a good , competent lawyer who will take your case on and receive their fee along with the settlement. You should not give up. Don't be a victim. In the business world, you would be advised to hire your weaknesses so that your strength is complete.
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Giving up and cutting your losses is more likely to weaken your spirit and produce health issues than fighting with all your might. My advice is to get a bigger, badder and braver attorney right away. And pray for "divine justice" each and everyday and ask you friends to pray for the same. And tell your husband that you have no problem with being a bag lady because that bag will soon be filled with all his money. |
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Giving up and cutting your losses is more likely to weaken your spirit and produce health issues than fighting with all your might. My advice is to get a bigger, badder and braver attorney right away. And pray for "divine justice" each and everyday and ask you friends to pray for the same. And tell your husband that you have no problem with being a bag lady because that bag will soon be filled with all his money. |
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Go hire some good Legal counsel not small town Attorney's who can't handle themselves against His 4 Attorney's. Make sure they work on getting paid from M when the case is settled..be specific. Make sure you concern yourself with the facts of the case and not the emotional feeling you are having. Don't play the victim anymore. Ask them what is realistic and what you can expect..best and worse case scenario and have they been successful in this type case with these type circumstances..no BS... Might as well go for broke if he is paying..just saying. Because nothing from nothing is nothing. Make him want to settle. Let them follow the money and see where it leads. I had a client (an Attorney) in the past who told me he wanted to switch Law firms. At that time he worked for the best Law Firm in Jersey. I asked him why he wanted to leave he said he wanted to go to work for the best law firm in the County who made every other Law Firm shake in their Boots when they had to come up against them. Need I say more on who to choose when looking for Legal Counsel? Good Luck, forget the BS and go for the throat. You have nothing to lose. Get yourself centered, sit back, make believe all this doesn't exist and let them do the work. Competency ..a lot can be said for it. olivialeeskye |
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Hi, I was drawn to your post. My first thoughts are how many others go through something similar behind closed doors. I have been through divorce and rebuilding my life, yet to settle the financial stuff and it has been 3 years since the split. For me the best thing I did was make the decisio to leave, the most challenging thing is to re-build my life. I know from experience, what you focus on expands and while I wanted to build a new life, I didnt understand fully at the time my negative emotions were not allowing me to see clearly enough to take back the power to control my life. You have a lot going on, but one day you will get past this, with or without the best legal support. If you ask the lady in your life that went through the same thing I bet she would say that she is glad she left, no regrets, but learning to be self sufficient again is something only you can do. It is difficult now, but try to trust that you have come to this community so you can get love and support to get you through the worst. My blessing go out to you. -- Iona Meade- The UK's Leading Vision & Life Purpose Business Coach, Founder of IHPMA & Creator of Central Purpose Online Mentoring Community
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Sometimes, for health reasons, it is better to cut your losses and walk away. Yes, it isn't fair but then again, you don't want the stress to ruin your health. Take heart in the fact that BAD people never win in the long run but it is disappointing having to wait. If you have the funds you might find an attorney in another town that wouldn't be afraid to take the case. |
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M's dad is the brother of former State Senator B.Stout. I have only met him a couple of times and he seemed very different than the one I married and his dad (lucky for him, not I). They compared themselves to the Kennedys' and Camelot, which Kennedys' I don't know. His dad was married to his mom for 32 yeasrs and when he decided to divorce her, he transferred properties to others names. So, when it was final they would transfer it back to him. This is how M learned and from an expert. M bragged about his 4 (!) attorneys and that they would' tear me up'. I have been a homemaker and mother for 20+ years, so was very blindsided. (After a deposition with a woman attorney on the prosecution team of the Brad Cooper team -withdrew. I had people calling me about the eerily similarities between them). W had a brother (J) who died suddenly that was in business with another brother (G). When J passed away G kept the life insurance policy and more, leaving J's widow and 2 children to fend for themselves. For eight years she fought for her children, and herself. Settled for very little 'just to get on with her life' and still having to work to have 'average'. Now her struggle is to get through all the chemotherapy she has ahead of her to fight the breast cancer she has. If she hadn't turned 65 in 2010, where would she be with no insurance at all? Or where would she be had she had the health insurance she should have had? I don't know anyone who has dealt with a family like this, but I need some advice asap? My husband had given me the email 'sunshine247' because I was (keyword past tense) just that. After fighting for my children and for what is mine for 3 years now, wonder if I, too, will be looking for the diseases stress causes. With or without insurance. Advice or help so welcome~asap! |
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