I was sexually abused as a young child, then molested when I was close to my teen age... I guess it describes why I'm not very intimate with my husband at times... I don't have much to say but it takes quite a toll on our lives and at times I find I have a break down because of it... I like this topic... it may help us all cope with what has happened to us... Thank you for reading this ^.^

I was molested as a young child by my own father and raped when I was just 18. I had a very beautiful daughter as a result of the rape. My daughter is in my parents custody, I have not seen her since she was 12. I was abused by my 1st husband with whom I had a son. I tried to make the marriage work for almost four years. I then realized I and my son deserved much better. When he beat me for the last time, I ran to the safety of the local QuikTrip. I hid there in the bathroom crouched on one of the toilets until my parents could come and get me. When the police showed up I took my son and left with my parents. I then divorced him. Unfortunately, He now has custody of my son and I have not seen my son since he was 2 1/2 yrs. old. Neither of my children want anything to do with me due to whatever it is that my mother told them. My parents disowned me when I moved to be with my now husband.

My 2nd husband is absolutely sweet and wonderful. He is very supportive. I made it an issue to be point blank, open and honest with him about everything from the get go. We met online in a chat room, chatted for three weeks on an instant messenger, 2 phone calls, he flew me up on Valentine's Day in 2004 with the idea he was just helping me out of a very bad situation, we fell deeply in love and were married on June 26,2004. We are soon to be celebrating our 6th wedding anniversary.

Open communication is the key to our relationship. Him being understanding and supportive is a real asset as well. My struggles are far from over. I still continue to have nightmares at times. I am still not very trusting of men, particularly men who weigh around 225-250 and are 5'7" as they remind me very strongly of my father. I still tend to bottle things up from time to time; however, I now write letters on the computer and print them out for my husband to read. It's a one day at a time process. I am currently looking for a good psychiatrist under my current health plan. Many illnesses I currently have stem from my abuse.
So if you are still interested, I am here


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God Bless and Keep You,

K.M. Roth

I am interested in connecting with other women who have gone through sexual abuse (as a child or an adult) and who are now currently married. I want to know what kind of struggles you are going through in maintaining a good, strong, healthy relationship with your spouse while you continue to work through and heal from the abuse.


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Kat Sullivan
www.ocklife.com